I have this ‘I am independent and don’t need a man to do things’ attitude, but I still have a belief in gender roles. In a way, it is more of an expectation than a belief. I expect that if a woman is standing that the man should at least offer her the seat. I have the belief that since men claim to be this ever strong creature that in the case of lack on sleeping space, they should take the floor while the woman can have the bed or couch. I do actually believe that being a stay at home mom is a career and if I could have the luxury of being there for my children like my mother was able to do for me while I was in elementary school then I would do the same. My views I could be considered weird, I am very back and forth on the subject of gender roles. I think both could have careers or one could stay home. I was raised in the type of family where it was somewhat expected for the mother to stay home and the father to work. Once my parents divorced, that changed but from seeing that structure of a family and of gender roles for eleven years, it is hard to shrug off those thoughts of that is how it should be.
I do expect myself to be classier when I become and wife and eventually a mother than I am now. I will be a nurturer and a provider and have to set a good example of how a lady/woman should be even in this screwed up world. I want my future children to know that a woman is not weak but also strong and vice versa for men. Gender roles are everything, nothing, and forever changing. I grew up with a certain belief and I do not know how Adam sees it. I am kind of worried about his views but we are two individuals who will not always have the same opinion. People need to understand and respect that when it comes to somewhat touchy subjects like this people are always going to have a different train of thought.
If I don’t need someone to do something for me, I will do it myself. There will be times that I know I will let Adam do something for me instead, just to let him, and to let him feel good about himself. Sometimes letting people do things for you can be the best ways of showing that you need them in your life. I am being to realize that more and more each day while being in this relationship with Adam. I remind myself that I am not alone, that I do not have to do everything by myself, that I have someone here for me to help me even when I do not need the help. I am very grateful for that. Gender roles or no gender roles. Life is one interesting, complex, always changing thing. I guess I do not fit in the category of old fashioned or modernist. I am just me with my own weird, at-times-condescending thoughts and opinions.